OK, all my Readers who didn’t follow my instructions in the last blog please stand up. Bernie, you, Wex, Mary Ann and Phil stay seated. The rest of you, all 1,204 of you, please stand up. That’s right, even all you new Readers should stand up. You too, Stan and Harriett.

STAN: I don’t see why he’s lumping us in with the Readers. We’re just imaginary characters.
HARRIETT: Just do what he says, Stan. He could eliminate us entirely.

Now the rest of you, all you Readers who are standing, do you know what Bernie, Wex, Mary Ann and Phil did that made me happy? They left me a Comment like I asked you all to do!

I guess I shouldn’t complain. After all, almost three dozen Readers wrote to my personal e-mail account. But many of you wanted me to be a little more specific about Why You’re Here on Earth. And several of you asked me if I could simplify The Meaning of Existence.

One Reader actually asked me if I could “Dumb it down, a little.”

HARRIETT: Was that you, Stan? Were you the one who asked Jack to Dumb Down the Meaning of Existence?
STAN: Not exactly. I used a fake name.
 HARRIETT: What fake name did you use?
STAN: Fake Name! That’s the fake name I used.
HARRIETT: You used the fake name FAKE NAME?
STAN:  I did. Pretty clever, huh?
HARRIETT: Oh, yes. (SAID HARRIETT JOKINGLY). Jack will never figure that out.
STAN: That’s what I thought. 

Now, I’m not sure who that Reader was. But my guess is it was Stan because he used the fake name Fake Name.

But I decided to take Fake Name up on the challenge and simplify the Meaning of Existence. Sounds impossible doesn’t it? Well, they don’t call this blog 10 Minutes of Brilliance for nothing! Here, in the fewest words possible, is the Answer to the Ultimate Question, “Why You Are Here on Earth.”

 The Meaning of Life, The Meaning of Existence. And the Seven Reasons Why You Are Here on Earth. PLUS, as an added Bonus, The Greatest Card Trick in the World.

Here are your 7 assignments while you are here in Earth.

1. Take care of yourself-physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally.

2. Care for others. Make the world a better place. Practice good karma. When in doubt, apply the Golden Rule.

3. Be mindful. This is the most difficult task of all. Try to be conscious of being conscious.

4. Love someone. Put someone else’s needs before yours. “The Love you take is equal to the Love you make.” The Rutles (aka the Fab Four before they were Fab)

5. Be happy. Genuinely enjoy all that you are, even all that you have. The Universe appreciates appreciation.

6. Create. It doesn’t have to be a work of art, as much as a work of you.

7. Learn and Grow. The Universe is expanding. You should too.

And now as promised, the Greatest Card Tick in the World.

I could go on…

STAN: Yeah, and you probably will. 
HARRIETT: All right, Stan. Jack was just trying to impart a little Universal wisdom.
STAN: Well, he doesn’t have to do it here. Let him find his own blog.
HARRIETT: This is his blog.
STAN: Oh, yeah.Right.

Well, I guess I could leave you all with a simplified Meaning of Existence (and The Greatest Card Trick in the World. That should be enough to ponder until the next blog. But as important as it is, learning why you are here on Earth and what you should do about it seems like it might be too serious and solemn a subject to end this blog post on. Even for my Brilliant Readers.

So I thought I’d add one bit of levity to lighten the mood. After all, the Universe enjoys a good laugh.

A third grade teacher in Manville, Virginia, asked her class to complete some well known phrases. Their answers were revealing because the kids were expressing Reality as only they could see it. Here are her phrases and the kids’ responses.

1. Don’t change horses ………………until they stop running.
2. Strike while the……………………..bug is close.
3. It’s always darkest before…………Daylight Saving Time.
4. When the blind lead the blind……get out of the way
5. You can lead a horse to water but..how?
6. No news is……………………………impossible.
7. Don’t bite the hand that……………looks dirty.
8. A miss is as good as a………………Mr.
9. You can’t teach an old dog new…..math.
10. If you lie down with dogs, you’ll….stink in the morning.
11. Love all, trust………………………….me.
12. The pen is mightier than the……….pigs.
13. Where there’s smoke there’s………..pollution.
14. Happy is the bride who………………gets all the presents.
15. A penny saved is………………………not much.
16. Two’s company, three’s……………..the Musketeers
17. There is none so blind……………….as Stevie Wonder
18. If at first you don’t succeed………….get new batteries
19. Better late than………………………..pregnant.
20. Children should be seen and not….spanked

Well, that’s all for today, Brilliant Readers. I appreciate your stopping by. I would love it if you’d leave me a Comment. Did you like today’s post? Did you learn anything? Any personal experiences with your own Quest for the Meaning of Life you’d like to share?

No? That’s OK. but if you’re Comment averse and just don’t want to commit yourself publicly, then do something else to help me out. Tweet the blog. Or send a link to the blog to a friend or two. Or just put into play any or all of the 7 Reasons why You Are Here on Earth. That will help the Universe and that, in turn, will help me. You know why.

Because we’re all One.