I almost didn’t get to write today’s blog. I had so much on my To Do List.
My To Do List
1. Hand photo to a stranger on a crowded elevator. Get out at the next floor and say quietly, “It has to look like an accident.”
2. Go to McDonald’s drive-thru. Order a Happy Meal with extra Happy.
3. Hire two private investigators. Have them follow each other.
4. Show someone on an elevator a box of Animal Crackers. Say, “I’d give you some, but it said, ‘Do not eat if seal is broken.’”
5. Go to a Home Goods store or Target to the section where they sell throw pillows. Start throwing all the pillows.
6. Go to South Pole. Eat something disgusting. See if you can throw down.
7. Look at see-through glass when someone is looking through the other side and shout “OH MY GOD, I’M HIDEOUS!”
8. Buy a parrot. Teach him to say, “Help. Help. I’ve been turned into a parrot.”
9. Buy two packs of Skittles. Taste the “double rainbow.”
10. Be a ghost writer for Halloween.
Today, we’ve cover:
How Twitter and 4 Other Famous Products Got Their Names
How Jimmy Fallon Got Paul McCartney’s Accent
How the United States of America Got so Screwed Up
How 10 Famous People Indelicately Describe S-E-X
Job Advice for Seniors: The #1 Reason Old People Don’t Get Hired
How Pez, Twitter, Chanel No. 5, Dubble Bubble Gum and Yahoo Got Their Names
PEZ
PEZ was first marketed as a compressed peppermint candy in Vienna, Austria over 70 years ago. It got its name from the German word for peppermint: PffErminZ. About 3 billion Pez are sold in the US every year.
STAN: That’s it. That’s the whole story.
HARRIET: Yup, some time Jack’s stories are short.
STAN: Thank God.
CHANEL No. 5
Gabriella Bonheur Chanel (a k a Coco Chanel) was born to an unwed mother who worked as a laundrywoman in a charity hospital. Her father was an itinerant street peddler who sold undergarments and work clothes.
When her mother died when she was 12, her father sent her two brothers to work on a farm and Gabrielle and her two sisters were sent to an orphanage in central France. Her early life was anything, but glamorous.
At the convent Gabrielle “Coco’ Chanel learned to sew. She learned so well she turned herself into one of the world’s most iconic fashion designers, the only fashion designer to appear on Time Magazine’s list of the 100 most influential people of the 20th century.
STAN: Jesus, does Goldberg ever “cut to the chase?” His stories go on forever.
HARRIET: Stan you are obstreperous and impertinent.
STAN: Compliment me all you want, Harriet, I just wanna hear the fricken story.
In 1920 or 1921, Russian perfumer, Earnest Beaux presented Coco with small glass vials of scent numbered 1–5 and 20–24. Coco chose the perfume in the fifth vial. Chanel is also reported told her master perfumer, “I present my dress collections on the fifth of May, the fifth month of the year and so we will let this sample number five keep the name it has already, it will bring good luck.”
Yahoo
In 1994, two Ph. D. Candidates in Electrical Engineering at Stamford, David Filo and Jerry Yang, were having so much fun on the Internet, they made a list of their favorite sites. They called the list “Jerry and David’s Guide to the World Wide Web.”
The more time they spent on the Internet, the more their list of favorite sites grew and eventually they has to make subgroups of the original list of links. The links they liked kept growing and growing until their sub groups had groups under them.
They thought the name, “Jerry and David’s Guide to the World Wide Web,” was too long so they looked up possible names in a dictionary. They eventually settled on an acronym, Yahoo, which stood for “Yet Another Hierarchical Officious Oracle.”
Damn, sure glad they shortened it.
The idea for Twitter emerged out of a daylong brainstorming session for a podcasting company called Odeo. Twitter was created by Jack Dorsey, Evan Williams, Biz Stone and Noah glass in March 2006.
Originally, Twitter was created as an SMS service for individuals to communicate with small groups. The original code name for the service was “twttr.” It was inspired by the name of the photo-sharing site Flickr.
The name they eventually settled on was Twitter and when co-founder Jack Dorsey sent the first twitter message at 9:50 PM PST on March 21, 2006, the message read, “just setting up my twttr.”
Another potential name for Twitter was Jitter and Twitch. They spotted the name twitter when looking up twitch in a dictionary.
Dorsey explained how the name then evolved.
“We came across the word twitter and it was just perfect. The definition was ‘a short burst of inconsequential information’ and ‘chirps from birds.’ And that’s exactly what it was.’”
Mashable has a different explanation for how the name Twitter evolved. They say an employee of the podcasting company, Odeo, picked it out of a hat. But I know for a fact that explanation is false and Dorsey’s explanation is true.
How do I know that? A little birdie told me.
Dubble Bubble Gum
Frank Fleer invented the first bubble gum in 1906. However the gum was never marketed because it was too sticky to properly blow bubbles. It had the consistency of Silly Putty and produced sticky, wet bubbles that splattered when they exploded.
The Frank H. Fleer Company tried to improve the formula for 22 years, but hey could never invent it properly. It seemed like Blabber Blubber would die on the drawing table. Or at least stick to it.
Then in 1928, Walter Dimmer, an accountant at Fleer, added latex to the Blibber Blubber formula and the first commercially successful bubble gum was created. The accountant colored his formulation with the only color food dye available at his company, pink, and for 50 years all bubble gum was manufactured with a pick color.
How Jimmy Fallon Got Paul McCartney’s Accent
Then the other night I caught a Paul McCartney interview on JImmy Fallon. The interview was great, but my favorite part was prior to the interview when Jimmy Fallon accidentally bumped into Paul backstage. Here. Have a look.
How the United States of America Got so Screwed Up
Don’t get me wrong. The US of A is the greatest country in the world. Nevertheless, I think I found out why, at times, things go wrong in America. Here’s a map that clearly shows why our priorities are so screwed up.
In only 8 of our 50 states, the highest paid public employee is NOT a coach.
How 10 Famous People Indelicately Describe S-E-X
Tom Clancy: “I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.”
Rodney Dangerfield: “My wife said she wanted to have sex in the back of our car…with me driving.”
George Burns: “It isn’t premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married.”
Swami X: “Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. ‘Yes’ is the answer.
Lynn Lavner: “”There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in a women. Among these is the Mercedes-Benz 500SL.”
Woody Allen: Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go it’s pretty damn good.”
Joan Rivers: “It’s been so long since I’ve had sex, I forgot who ties up whom.”
Chris Rock: “A man is basically as faithful as his options.”
Les Dawson: “My wife is a sex object. Every time I want to have sex, she objects.”
Steve Martin: “You know ‘that look’ women get when they want to have sex? Yeah, me neither.”
Job Advice for Seniors: The #1 Reason Old People Don’t Get Hired
Job Interview
Human Resources Manager: “What’s your greatest weakness?”
Senior Citizen: “Honesty.”
Human Resources Manager: “I don’t think honesty is a weakness.”
Senior Citizen: “I don’t really give a s**t what you think.”
Well Readers, it’s the end of another day here at Romper Room, I mean, 10 Minutes of Brilliance. Thanks for stopping by. If you enjoyed today’s blog, I’d like to ask you for a favor. Could you leave me a comment? Please? You see, even though the analytics report on my blog says I have over 9,000 Readers, I have a feeling that 8,999 of you aren’t getting the blog delivered to your inbox.
Now, I always get 5 or 10 personal e-mails after each blog and I appreciate that very much. It’s good for my ego, not so good for Goggle, however. You see, Google likes it when Readers leave comments. They reward me with more search traffic. And that makes me very HAPPY! Bye for now.
